Let Go & Grow




Confused? Don’t be..I simply just learnt how to say ‘Hello, how are you doing’ in ‘Xhosa’ a South African language.

Today, let’s talk about forgiveness, what a glut of it does and what a lack of it does also. I’ld like to think that the average person strives to get better at and improve on whatever he does, if you agree, let us review this sensitive subject that can either accelerate or retard one’s growth and progress.

As you read through, please bear in mind that when I was writing this article, I felt that a proper way to get my message across would be to cite examples from real life experiences, you know…Something we can relate to.

In the past, I used to be a very vindictive and unforgiving fellow, ever willing to take an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth, kept accurate details of any wrong done to me with respect to time, event, scene, day and any other details that a jury would find relevant before rendering their verdict…Friendlies! I do not think I can stress it enough because it was so bad that mother never failed to mention it to our Father in heaven whenever it was her turn to pray during morning devotions.

This trend continued for  long and I did not realise the damaging effects on those around me neither did I see any reasons for mother’s constant worries until sometime ago, when I took a statistics of my life, it dawned on me that a great percentage of the friends I had lost were not guilty of anything rather it was me who scared them away with weights I had carried from past experiences. I was constantly looking over my shoulders, never trusting anyone, readily armed to the teeth and ‘defensive’ became my middle name. On meeting a person for the first time, I would give them long, hard stares in an effort to scan the deepest recesses of their souls  to know if they had come to hurt or help.

Now, we all are humans and are bound to offend one another from time to time but here’s what Jesus says in Luke 17: 3-4;

“So be careful! If your brother sins, tell him he is wrong. If he is sorry {and stops sinning}, forgive him. If your brother does something wrong to you seven times in one day, but he says that he is sorry each time, then you should forgive him.” (ERV)

On inspection, I noticed that this chapter from the bible did not instruct us on what to do if the trespasser refuses to repent. Dissatisfied and a bit confused, I went on searching until Exodus 14:14 hit me with the words “The lord shall fight for you and you shall hold your peace”. (KJV) How comforting is that?


You’ll never unlock your happiness if you keep holding back. Let go, stop trying to get even, God has enough on each of us to bury us, yet He refuses to resurrect our past sins. So why do we remind others of their offences? I know it’s very easy for us to say ‘I am not God and no one should expect me to deal with situations the way God would’. But remind yourself also that you are created in his image and you have grace freely bestowed on you. In Romans 12:19, God says ‘Vengeance is mine, I will repay’.

The way you grow and mature as you get older is the same way that any seeds of bitterness that lurk within your heart grow. Violent expressions  results from pain, anger, strife and unforgiveness that developed over time into unbearable weights.

I ask you this day to please forgive everyone for everything. Sure, it’s easier to forgive when others acknowledge their offence and actually apologise. But if that’s a prerequisite to forgiveness, you may never experience victory and total freedom.

If your parent(s) could not send you to reputable schools because they lacked the resources to do so and you believe it has affected you in some way, forgive them, they did the best jobs they knew how to do. Forgive society for whatever damage or loss it has caused you. For all the things you should have done that you didn’t do, forgive yourself because you are too precious and you deserve your love, do not be too hard on yourself, get rid of every trace of bitterness in you. It may not be as easy as I’ve put it but if you will, God can bring you through it all.


Not everyone is out to hurt or harm you, all they need is a little trust and a fighting chance.

Do it for yourself and remember that letting go is hard but holding on is harder because what you don’t forgive, you have to relive!




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